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Cast:

  • Robert the Hedgehog - E.B. (Hop)
  • Dennis the Anteater - Archibald the Koala
  • Sidney the Elephant - Berk (The Trap Door)
  • The Fly - Plankton (Spongebob Squarepants)
  • Arthur the Worm - Paddington Bear
  • Heidi the Hippo - Pearl Pureheart (Mighty Mouse)
  • Lucille the Poodle - Yin (Yin Yang Yo!)

Transcript

  • E.B./Robert: Excuse me, please. I wonder if you can help me. I've a letter here requesting me to report to the stage manager.
  • Archibald the Koala/Dennis: I'm busy. Ask somebody else.
  • E.B./Robert: Oh, well, no... you see... Excuse me, sir. I wonder if you can help. I've a letter here asking me to report to the stage manager.
  • Berk/Sidney: I don't know man. It's been a hell of a day. I can feel a migraine coming on. I need a paracetamol.
  • Plankton/Fly: Up here! New boy are you? Looking for Paddington?
  • E.B./Robert: Is he the stage manager?
  • Plankton/Fly: That's what he calls himself. You'll never find him. I'll take you there.
  • E.B./Robert: Thank you very much. I had an audition six months ago and I've just got the confirmation... of my acceptance into the Feeble Chorus.
  • Plankton/Fly: I tell you what, kiddo. It's not that crash hot. They run you ragged and they pay's lousy.
  • E.B./Robert: I'm not worried about the pay. It's an honour just to get a chance... to perform in the show. I've been an admirer of the Feebles for such a long time.
  • Plankton/Fly: Yeah? You'll find it pretty tough on the wages they dish out. But if you ever want to earn a little extra on the side... I'm always interested in little stories... anything spicy or even smutty. Hey Paddington! There's a new boy to see you. There's more filth here than in the city sewers. And I pay good money for the right info. Here you go, kid. Don't hesitate to get in touch.
  • Paddington Bear/Arthur: You must be E.B.. I've been expecting you.
  • E.B./Robert: Pleased to meet you sir.
  • Paddington Bear/Arthur: Just call me Paddington. Here you don't want that, son. He's a non-good muckraker from the gutter press. Got nothing better to do than make up lies... and nasty stories about the cast. Ooh! That's Miss Pearl Pureheart. You'll have heard of her.
  • E.B./Robert: I certainly have. She's my favourite star.
  • Paddington Bear/Arthur: Excuse me, girls. Can I have your attention for a minute? I'd like to introduce you all to a new member of the chorus. I'm sure you'll do your best to make him feel a part of the Feeble family. Come on, say hello E.B.. Don't be bashful.
  • Various Animals/Girls: Oh, isn't he handsome? What a lovely set of quills!
  • Paddington Bear/Arthur: That's Yin. She's just joined the chorus as well. You two should get together sometime.
  • Various Animals/Girls: Is it true that long quills are a sign of virility?
  • Now look what you've done! You've gone and got him all embarrassed. Come on E.B. old son. Uncurl, there's a good boy.
  • Gadget Hackwrench/Girls 1: I think he fancies you, Yin.
  • Tammy/Girls 2: Yes, it's true love all right.
  • Foxglove/Girls 3: See the way he looked at you.
  • Yin/Lucille: Stop it! He's just an old rabbit!
  • Fitness Tape Voice: Get up your knees! Put your head up! Don't forget to breath!

Movies/TV Shows Used:

  • Hop (2011)
  • Archibald the Koala
  • The Trap Door
  • Spongebob Squarepants
  • Paddington (1975 TV Series)
  • The New Adventures of Mighty Mouse
  • Gallopin' Gals
  • It's a Grand Old Nag
  • Yin Yang Yo!
  • Chip 'n' Dale Rescue Rangers